Idiot!

Again and again and again!! Who's got so much patience for the same nonsense everytime!? Driving me mad...

After Tuesday's quarrel, I thought he tried to make an effort to make a change and make me happy for once! He gave some excuse saying a friend treating him to dinner, so he could come out earlier to meet me last night.

Came to fetch me in a cab around 8:15PM. I got on the cab. Blabbing about soccer again.. Zzz.. But actually I didn't notice about it and I wasn't annoyed.. All the way from my house till we reached TBP(Tiong Bahru PLaza)... Then he was on his phone.. Don't know checking what.. SMS or GPRS.. I don't know.. From 1st floor to 2nd floor.. He was with me in a shop browsing some garments.. I went to test out the piece, came out from the fitting room wanted to show him he disappeared from the shop again.. Changed back to my clothes and found him standing outside the shop looking at the mobile still. Zzz.. Then from 2nd floor to 3rd floor.. Still on the mobile! He just tag beside me looking at his mobile.. Sometimes lagging behind and lost sight of me.. Zzz.. In fact I wasn't really annoyed still.. Then eventually I asked him, in a normal tone, "What are you checking on your phone?" And he just flared and raised his voice at me, "Nothing lah! Just send a few SMS to ask people to transfer money lah! What's wrong!?" KNN!! You dare get angry before I do!! I was just asking nicely!! Damn pissed! I stomped off!

He probably lost sight of me, but didn't bother to call or SMS me to check where I was.. I went out of the building for a smoke! Damn pissed! Need to cool off a bit.. Called Ashlie to chat.. Then saw him walking out of the mall too.. He spotted me.. Stood at one side of the pillar and waited for me while I was still on my phone. I ended the call with Ashlie shortly.. Stared at him.. He accused me for making a fuss and restricting him from looking at his mobile! WTF! I only asked nicely once!!! Before he raised his voice earlier, I wasn't even annoyed or upset at all!! Just 10 seconds before the thing happened, I was still smiling at him and browsing and showing to him a set of Hello Kitty pyjamas!!! He knew that he had been on the phone too long and he knew I wouldn't like it! HE IS conscious about it!! Which is why when I finally asked about it, he got frustrated and raised his voice at me! So IF he is conscious about it, then STOP doing it! NO INITIATIVE AT ALL! And still dare to get angry before I do!

I said I didn't restrict him from using the phone at all! But he should know his limits!! All the way since we reached the mall!? Then what's the point of coming out!? I don't need an idiot to tag beside or BEHIND me and the mind drift away to don't know where! He kept on lost sight of me and I had to look for him and wait for him to catch up! Everything is absolutely fine because I was in a good mood until he raised his voice at me! And still not apologetic at all! Then he pointed back at me saying I was also on the phone neglecting him! WTF!! It was because he pissed me so much that I walked out to have a smoke and called Ashlie to chat! Only for less than 5 minutes!

He wanted to get over with it and asked me to stop the quarrel. Trying to drag me to move. I was damn pissed!! His fucking attitude!! I didn't want to forgive him so easily! Did something wrong and trying to get away with it by finding fault with me! A big man can't even admit his own mistake! DAMN SHAMEFUL! And I demand an apology. He just went like, "FINE! SORRY! LET'S GO NOW DON'T STAND HERE!" What kind of apology is that?! FUCK! Then I replied him, "I AM SORRY I AM VERY UNREASONABLE NOW! BCOS U MADE ME DAMN PISSED AND U DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO APOLOGISE! I HAD TO REQUEST FOR AN APOLOGY WHICH YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO TAKE INITIATIVE! AND YOUR APOLOGY IS NOT SINCERE AT ALL!"

After a while I decided to get over with it. He voluntary held my hand to walk back into the mall. Supposed to go for dinner before the shops closed. While walking, he was mumbling in silence, some sort like cursing and giving me some scowls and that tulanz face! I just shaked his hand off! WTF! U held my hands voluntarily! Stop that nonsense! You were wrong in the first place! I never beg you to give in to me! Stop giving that fucking attitude!

At the dinner we didn't talk. And he STILL checking on his mobile all the while!!! KNN!! Look at this fucking idiot!! He really trying to piss people off! I just kept quiet all the way! Couldn't be bothered to say anything because I know if I opened my mouth it would be quarrel! I SURE FUCK AND SCREAM AT HIM! And he DON'T KNOW WHAT IS AUTOMATIC!!!!

After dinner was waiting for cab at the roadside. Waited for quite long. He KNN STILL on his mobile!! Probably to him, since there's nothing to do other than waiting for a cab to come, so he might as well check his mobile! But to me, IF YOU BOTHER ABOUT HOW I FEEL, THEN YOU SHOULD JUST AVOID DOING IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! Waited for quite a while still no cab. He asked me to call for a cab. I don't understand why he must always ask me to call when he ALSO HAS A PHONE! FINE! I called, but engaged! And I continued trying. Then he was on his phone again! I walked towards him and purposely take a look at what he is looking. WTF!! Log in GPRS to check score!! KNNCCB!! You asked me to call for a cab, YOU YOURSELF CHECKING SCORE! WTF!! Purposely keep repeating the same thing!!! FUCKING IDIOT! Not interested to make peace is it!? Cannot take initiative to avoid doing the things that pissed me!!!

Finally got a cab. In the cab STILL FUCKING checking the mobile! Reached my place before I got down, tried to give me a goodbye kiss. I pushed him away. For wat?! What's the meaning of it?! Feeling sorry?! Then tell me about it! Then should have stop repeating the nonsense! What's the meaning of a kiss!? Fuck! I no mood for this! Not going to forgive him easily!

I wasn't particular over him looking at the mobile anymore.. I was really angry because his attitude!! And even more pissed that he can't even take initiative!!! It just show that he was not interested to make peace at all!! Normally I'll call him when I reached home. Last night I didn't. Instead, I sent him a series of SMS.. So angry!! Complained to Xta on MSN!

After reading my SMS, he did call up to apologise in a nicer tone. But spoke awhile he tried to argue again! Still trying to find fault with me! Fuck! If you want to apologise! Then just admit your mistake and stop argueing! Spoke halfway he had to go back to work and we put down the phone. Later he finally called again to apologise! This time really apologise! And said the right things! Admit his mistakes! Said that we only have a few hours to go out and yet wasted away without paying attention on me. EXACTLY! Knn! This is why I am pissed! NOT that I restrict him using his mobile! KNN! How limited the time we can spend together! And he always waste them away!! He still tried to give excuse saying that I have to understand him because sometimes he had too much things in his mind and would get carried away. WTF?! Don't give me excuse!! Sometimes?? It's EVERYTIME! I emphasized EVERYTIME!!! He said he'll try his best... Zzz.. He told me he'd try his best many times already!! Did he tried?? Not even once done!! This is call trying your best? If you are trying your best, then when I point it out on the spot, you should have stopped it immediately!!

Anyway, since he said the right things.. Finally.. I forgave him.. Xta told me.. Must blog down everytime he look at his mobile.. LOL.. Sure! I will blog down!! EACH and EVERYTIME! I am waiting to see if he finally make an effort not to piss me! Grrr...

Bad mood shouldn't really bet!! Last night lost away my winnings since Monday.. But nevermind.. As long as not losing.. Just now he woke up and SMS me.. Wake up straight away SMS me about soccer.. Zzz.. And added ask me don't be angry ah! Kaoz.. I replied him and cursed him.. I told him I hope he lose money.. So he would regret staying at home to bet.. Should have come out and meet me better...